Sorry Homework

I will:

• kiss you
• pack your lunch
• make the bed
• kiss you when you’re mad or sad
• catch spiders
• get the mail
• hug you all the time
• kiss your boo boos
• make you food
• snuggle with you
• support you and your dreams
• listen to you talk about your problems
• kiss you some more
• hold your hand in public
• play with your hair to soothe you
• kiss your forehead
• and your cheeks
• and your eyes
• and your nose
• and your mouth
• laugh at your jokes
• no matter how bad
• massage your back
• and love you
• forever
• and ever

(Source: zubat)

wewhofightmonsters:

wewhofightmonsters

if you ever feel sad, just remember that the first ever cloned cat in existence

was named copycat

they saw the opportunity and they took it

modestdemidov:

knifefarty:

when u Dad com home and make hte lasagna

lvysaur:

osamah:

lvysaur:

i could use a good laugh

haha

thanks

flipphones:

do you think prison guards use proactive to prevent breakouts

tupacabra:

tupacabra:

why do i have a file saved named pizza_babe.gif

oh that’s why ok

cumberbulge:

my brother just sat my mum down in the living room and started crying and she was getting really worried and he burst out with ‘I’M PREGNANT’ completely seriously, and my mum started yelling and was like ‘OH MY GOD, what the fuck, I raised you to be responsible’ and she was literally ranting for about 10 minutes until she realised and quietly walked out of the room

(Source: kinkston)

dickmark:

OKAY SO ALMOST 2 MONTHS AGO OUR ENGLISH TEACHER FORCED US TO ENTER A POETRY CONTEST AND I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER A POEM WHEN IT TRIED TO FORCE ME TO GIVE IT A TITLE SO IN A FIT OF RAGE I WROTE A NEW POEM COMPLAINING ABOUT THE TITLE REQUIREMENT

AND TODAY I WENT TO CHECK MY EMAIL AND I??????

YOU ARE LITERALLY PUBLISHING AN INSULT TO YOUR OWN RULES BUT OKAY I GUESS IF GETTING TALKED DOWN TO TURNS YOU ON SOMEHOW AND I GET PUBLISHED I’VE GOT NO COMPLAINTS HERE?

(Source: vonlipwigs)